We all have many roles we fulfill. When I am unhappy it may mean that the role I am currently in is not a happy one or is a stressful one. Let me explain.

Each person that I interact with requires that I fulfill a different role. For example, the strongest role in the world is one where I am a father and one where I am a son. I act differently in each of those roles. As a father or say a mother, I am required to be a better person and be a role model to my child or children. This role is universal. If you look all over the world in any county, any language or religion the role is almost the same. In fact look at the strong mothering or nurturing role in the animal kingdom. Whales, elephants, tigers, lions even penguins, birds, mice all nurture and protect their newly born or hatched babies. This role of parenting has been defined for us and its behaviour for billions of years. In humans that role never goes away, it stays with us till death. How we feel in that role, successful, a failure, non-existent, proud, ashamed all contributes to our feeling of being happy or being unhappy.

Let me go a bit further. Each friend and acquaintance I interact with requires of me to play a specific role for that relationship. The role I play makes me feel a certain way. For example I told my mother today that when I speak with her I always feel intelligent. It is not because she isn't, in fact it is the opposite. She is very intelligent. But when I speak with her we talk about so many different topics and I realize what a vast knowledge I have of those topics, whether it be business and stocks, technology, management spproaches or theory, parenting, relationships, the universe, animals and many many other topics. I don't understand why but when I speak with my mother I feel good afterwards and I feel smart. I enjoy our discussions because I can help explain many things. However when I speak to other family members or my father, I don't come away with the same feeling. When I speak with some friends I feel good and with others I feel awful.

So the role I am playing at the time, the role I am in in a particular moment may make me unhappy or make me feel good.

The roles I feel good in are the ones where I feel needed, understood, listened to and valued and respected as a person.

The role that make me unhappy are the opposite roles, where I am not listened to, am disrespected, am not needed or listened to.